Friday 9 November 2007

Firework Phobia


I HATE FIREWORKS! Everybody knows it so nobody, thank God, invites me to their bonfire night parties. I've known some dreadful nights when I stayed quaking in a friend's kitchen while the merry band of friends went off to some wretched mortar bomb fest, sparklers in hand.

From around October 28th to November 12th (let's get Diwali well over with as well), I try to stay home after dusk. I mean, how can you stick both fingers in your ears to blot out the bangers while carrying a handbag plus four carriers of supermarket shopping plus your gym gear?

I shall also admit (in hushed tones of shame and feebleness) that I have a mortal fear of Christmas crackers, too. And saints be praised that plastic bags have replaced those paper ones that wretched little boys used to blow up then bang with both hands, having crept up behind you in the hope of hearing you scream. (If anyone's going to do this to me, better bring me a clean pair of knickers, too.)

I once asked my mother if there was any reason why I should be so scared of sudden loud bangs. "When I was six or seven months pregnant with you," she recalled, "I was on a tram and a landmine exploded in the next street." This was 1945. Landmines were extremely loud. She and everyone on that tram must have been terrified for their lives. My theory to explain my phobia is that the sudden explosion and her terror registered with the foetus (me) and the two events were forever coupled in my mind. Loud bangs = fear for one's life.

I don't think I need a psychoanalyst to tell me this makes sense.

14 comments:

Unknown said...

I am exactly the same. I've hated them since I was a kid and once ran away from my mum and dad at a fireworks display. If I have to go out I have to put my fingers in my ears. It's not only the noise but the flash as well. I also hate motorbikes and balloons, so at parties I usually shut myself in the bathroom.

jsquared504 said...

I have this same phobia. I have had this fear for as long as I can remember, and it is such a pain to explain to people. Balloons, firecrackers, and even lawnmowers backfiring absolutely terrify me. I went to a therapist (free at university), and they honestly said "Oh, my dog is like that." Great. I love being compared to a dog...

I understand completely.

Heather said...

I wish my Fireworks phobia was so simple. I have to spend the week before the 4th of July at my aunt and uncles, with 2 types of ear plus, headphones with music and then a set of hunters ear protection over that. I eaven here the word firework and my panic attacks start and I feel like I am having a heart attack and I get very sick. My nerves are shot after this week and I feel hopeless. I am looking for a cure but have not found one. I hate anything that pops and go psycho if I hear anything.

My phobia started when I had a large firework explode by my head when I was 6 months old and I have never out grew it. It gets worse every year. It kills my boyfiend that I am this way, he just doesn't understand.

Jorge said...

I'm 36 y.o., I live in Portugal and I also suffer from firework phobia. it all started at the age of 3, when my parents took me to a popular summer feast but, all of a sudden, the firework display went terribly wrong and there were fireworks exploding among the people and everybody ran out screaming and trying to escape. and guess what? I was on the front row, of course! since then, I totally hate fireworks, can't stand it, it makes me totally nervous and stressed. I sweat, and I have tremors. when I was a kid, other kids did enjoy to make fun of me. as a 10 y.o. boy it's hard to listen to another kid saying to you: I love what you fear! I never talked about this phobia, except for my girlfriends. but I'm always affraid that people discover my phobia. my social life is adapted to avoid the enemy but sometimes radars fail... I never tried some professional help because I know that the only way to overcome this fear it to be exposed to it: and the idea of facing fireworks makes me totally sick! fortunatelly, I live in a region of Portugal where fireworks are not used that often, so I can control the situation. but when I travel abroad, things go easily out of control. Barcelona is terrible for fire phobics. they explode loud bombs on the streets, at any time of the day, without a special reason! and travelling through Spain in the summer is total hell! I recently was in Paris, in the beginning of June, and there were these kids playing with firecrackers on the street, my heart almost collapsed but I had to fear in silence because I was with a friend and didn't want her to know about my phobia. apparently, in France fireworks are sold in stores to everybody. I heard that in California fireworks are illegal so maybe it's a good place to be sometimes...? so, let's fight for a world free of fireworks!!! :) any further comments you can contact me at: boy.from.venus@gmail.com

alicia said...

It is the end of another terrible day in November. As you may know here in the Uk it is the peak season for fireworks.. Tonight, I have been sat crying helplessly and thought I should seek help.
Luckily I managed to book a week off work to avoid the situation. So embarrassing!!!
I dont know how my phobia developed, but i know one thing.. Im sick of sticking my fingers in my ears, my heart racing, having terrtible sweats, finding it hard to talk about and most of all not being able to enjoy it like everyone else. Its beginning to take over my life because its now any other loud bang like balloons!
Why should i not go out in November.. Why should i run a mile in a shopping centre when i see a kid scratching a balloon!

The only one thing that has made me feel good about today is that clearly im not alone...

I wish all of you best of luck... because as most wouldnt be able to say... " I know how you feel" xx

Jorge said...

hi Alicia,
you're definetely not alone in this phobia. you should come to Portugal, especially the south, where it is much safer than UK for fire phobics like us! it's been months since I heard a firework or something similar and I can have a regular social life. if you want to share in private you can reach me at boy.from.venus@gmail.com
stay safe.
xoxo
Jorge

Lily Cerise said...

I have found my people!! I empathize deeply with all of you. Today is the 4th of July in the US and I am getting ready to curl up in a ball on the bathroom floor (no windows in there) with headphones until morning.

Unknown said...

Me too, i am terrified of fireworks and i freak so badly, its hectic, i think i have ligyrophobia (the fear of loud bangs)

Lava_and_Smoothies said...

I have the same phobia (check my blog). Everyone laughs at me and I feel so alone. I am home alone tonight because I have nowhere to go and nobody will skip the fireworks to be with me. My heart will start palpitating and I will start CRYING. It is so embarassing. Thank goodness I am not alone!

alma said...

I have had this fear since I was a little girl. I dont think people understand it and think we are just being silly. 4th of July is just around the corner here in U.S., yes I WILL BE HOME LOCKED UP IN MY HOUSE!! I have little ones and I feel so bad that I cant enjoy it with them. I dont really mind firecrackers, its the loud explosive ones that make my heart pound, I sweat and tense up :(

alma said...

I have had this fear since I was a little girl. I dont think people understand it and think we are just being silly. 4th of July is just around the corner here in U.S., yes I WILL BE HOME LOCKED UP IN MY HOUSE!! I have little ones and I feel so bad that I cant enjoy it with them. I dont really mind firecrackers, its the loud explosive ones that make my heart pound, I sweat and tense up :(

Eve said...

Ive been terrified of fireworks for as long as I can remember. My friends all laugh at me and say its not a real phobia. I was really close to a firework display last night and nearly passed out. Other things such as balloons and cars backfiring also freak me out. Empathize with you all.

Unknown said...

Fourth of July is in 9 days! NOOOOO!

TarheelBabe1980 said...

Well, I find that if it isn't feasible to book a vacation away from the States, the movie theatre provides some relief. Trick there is make sure ears still protected after the film ends, just in case some idiot is still cracking them after midnight.