Location 1: efficiency 0

How about this? The new dentist is on the fringe of Harley Street, the most fashionable London location for private medics of all persuasions (there's even a brand new haemorrhoid clinic which, shudder, I may have to pay a visit to soon; I think I'd have been tempted to call it Piles of Smiles!). When you think of the money they rake in (I was quoted... wait for it... £5,600 for an inplant plus temporary bridge while the jaw is being prepared), you'd think they would be the very model of efficiency. And so, as I was leaving yesterday, I gaily fluted, "See you tomorrow."

The dental nurse frowned and flicked through the book. "I haven't got you down," she said. I produced the appointment card on which was written, Friday Oct 1, 12 noon. "That's my writing," she said. "Oh well, we'd better see you on Monday." No apology, no explanation for her failure to write it in the book. Just imagine if I'd arranged a day off work, or was coming a long way and had booked a rail ticket in advance!

Just heard on the radio that there is a threatened rail strike on Monday. So they won't be seeing me! All the same, it does not bode well...