A night on the bog

Someone wrote a book called A Year on the Loo. Well, today I had to take the first doze of laxatives, pre colonoscopy. The instructions said, 'Take at 5 pm. They take between 8 and 12 hours to work.' So I can expect to be rushing to the bathroom betwen 1 am and 3 am. How very uncivilised. Then at 8 am tomorrow, I have to take a sachet of Picolax, which is a very violent laxative, followed by another at 2 pm. Then no food till the procedure is over. My appointment is for 9.30 am on Wednesday. There'll be nothing left of me by then, just a skeleton wrapped in toilet paper!!!